


Ed's Boogs

by WarnerHedgehog



Category: Ed Gamble - Fandom
Genre: Baking, Food, Gen, Greg wallace, Humor, Press and Tabloids, Rosie Jones - Freeform, article, comedian - Freeform, report
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:34:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27725572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WarnerHedgehog/pseuds/WarnerHedgehog
Summary: Ed Gamble has a new sideline. Will it catch on?
Kudos: 1





	Ed's Boogs

Comedian Ed Gamble has been working with celebrity chef Heston Blumenthal on a brand new venture. Cashing in on a comedy routine, they have created Ed's Boogs, a range of large, filled puff pastries which are fairly square in shape. The product comes in two ranges: sweet and savoury, each currently consisting of six flavours: the sweet set comprises Swiss Chocolate, the Iced Belgian, the enigmatic Banana Boog, Oak Smoked Apple and Eccles, with star status given to the inspiration behind the whole thing, the Danish boog. The savoury selection are Chinese Chicken, Big Beefy, Sizzling Soya, Quintessentially Quinoa, Big Bold and Brassica and the rather croissant like Buttery.  
After 6 months of development, a launch party has recently been held at Heston's newest gastro pub, the Drowned Rat in Ealing, with members of the press and notable figures from the world of entertainment in attendance.  
Taking to the mic, Ed welcomed everyone and invited us to stuff Boogs into our faces until our cheeks stretch enormously, after which he explained how he came to rope Heston in, "I needed someone who had a love of the absurd, and who had no idea of paying attention to limitations and abnormality."  
He carried on gibbering his usual bumpf for another five minutes before handing the mic to Heston, "In this project, we have tried to fulfill the spirit of the original gag, and as such, the Boogs each weight exactly eight hundred grams. We have also tried to consider vegans as well as carnivourists while keeping everything absolutely lovely. Thats us done talking, so dig in my little piglets."  
Fellow comedian Rosie Jones was a guest at the shindig and was asked her opinion after trying the Oak Smoked Apple variety, after a pause to consider her response, she said, "That Gamble's got ideas above his station. Comedian? Vomedian more like. That was horrible."  
I asked if she could describe the flavour, and she replied, "I was expecting a nice hit of apple, but it just tastes like burnt wood. He's got no chance of selling that tat to anyone with taste buds."  
Others were less dismissive, including foodie Greg Wallace, who was expressively enthusiastic, "The Banana Boog is a revelation! Its the best thing since sliced onions, and I know my onions."  
Alex James of Blur was spotted nibbling a Sizzling Soya, he was too busy stuffing his chops to speak but simply gave us a thumbs-up.  
The general opinion seemed to be positive, but will that translate into sales? They go on the market next week, so we'll soon know if the public warms to them.


End file.
